Peace

Thomas and I had a talk this morning about peace. World peace, and personal peace. I realize that the only type of peace I have any real control over is my own. I realize that I am very lucky, I have a wonderful husband, family, friends, and career. Of course, everything is not perfect, I don't think it ever can be as we are not perfect.

When thinking what I would like to have a more "perfect" life, I came up with the fact that I want and need more girlfriends. I can work on that, and I am working on that, so this is not too big a deal.

To bring more peace to my life, I would need to heal a broken relationship. I have gotten to the point where I would allow the relationship to heal if the other individual would just pick up the phone. This is a situation where I feel I was really wronged, but I have accepted the fact that I won't ever receive an apology, that the other person just isn't capable of doing that. I think to make things more peaceful, you have to accept people where they are, limitations and all. I do realize that I am not yet at a point where I can pick up the phone and make that phone call, maybe because I am the one who last made a call, back in April of 2004. That phone call was never returned and I guess I am still waiting. There has been communication of sorts, via email. First it was friendly, then it turned nasty. The nastiness was not on my part, which is why I am still not quite ready to make the first move.

I have done a lot to move forward though. I have moved to the point where I would not require an apology, which is huge. This is significant movement on my part and it has brought me some measure of peace.

I don't understand why people won't own their mistakes, and do what they can to fix them. God always wants us to right any wrong we have committed, and I try hard to do this. Not everyone does though, even those who claim God in every aspect of their lives, that is hugely hypocritical to me.

Of course, the person I am in "conflict" with doesn't claim God at all, as far as I know. That may be some of the problem.

Oh well, I am rambling now. I will end here, if anyone has anything helpful to add, please do so.